I've been at the laptop for almost 2 hours listening to America's radio. I just found out a way cool function from iTunes. The radio, it classifies the genres and the era of the music making it simple for users. It even gives the title and the artist's name, way cool. I've always thought babies were the coolest little things ever. The way they try running towards you, but moves in stumbly movement, their cute little faces, the beautiful pieces of clothings that fits their petruding tummy and the silly stuff they do. As much as i want to be a dad, i don't wanna grow up. I'm afraid and terrified of what the world has in hold for me. I might meet some evil asshole and make my life miserable, get into trouble which death is the only way out, get stepped all over by others and become a bigger loser than i already am. I've got to find my hidden/natural talent before i hit 18/19 years old. So i can be a millionaire teen talent and make it to hollywood, meet Emma Roberts, get the sparks flying, start a family and live off the entertainment industry till my offsprings takes over. Who wants to start a sitcom with me? Maybe we hit off with something simple like "Friends" or "Seinfield" ? Then we move on to our very own "Everybody loves Caleb", "Mr Caleb", "3rd rock from the *moon*". Maybe in my thirties i'll do "Caleb Almighty", "Moon wars", "The Caleb Ultimum". Off i am to search for my talent.

My days are getting boring. I've not experienced anything funny for a week, maybe i'm becoming more mature :) Today was really a scary day, for no good reason, i started day dreaming in class (as usual), but this time i didn't day dream about how i saved some hot girl from a bad guy, enjoying life like how a millionaire would and such nice stuff. This time, i "day dreamed" about how i see myself without an education, wandering around begging for cash, no home, can't support my family and horrid stuffs. It was then i decided to buck up in class, so i started reading up on my notes in the MRT way back home and read through a little. I certainly hope this fire will rage for a long time, maybe enough to get me through the exams. So, within the short 11 seconds in the lift up to my house, i began to think why, why are our lives bounded by studies? And i got a straight, quick answer.It might all be thanks to the adversarial system of the government. Simply because : Expectation too high on youths and thus this gives employers the mindset of, no qualification you scram attitude. And in this case, we'll never get our lucky break. I hope someone gets appointed to recommend reforms on this and make our lives better. I simply cannot take this amount of pressure anymore, it is suffocating. Enough of ranting, i need a breather, just timely my school gave a week of holiday. The weather has been a real bitch recently, so damn humid. Makes me all iky and i have to bathe. The only people benifiting from this bitch weather is PUB, people have gotta take so many showers a day that their water bills rocket.

I really want to go down to cold storage, ask them if they sell "bodies". My body is aching so badly that i wanna replace it with another. Had a "party" at ryan's last night, didn't even got a wink of sleep. That greatly contributed to the aches, but who cares, it was fun. I arrived home at 7am, so caught a short nap and went to school. Not hard to guess, i was late, 30 minutes. The lecturer asked why, due to lack of sleep, i felt like there was a lack of oxygen and my brain couldn't fuction as per normal. So i said there was a jam when i took the MRT, i didn't even realise i said something so stupid until the lecturer jagged me. "So i suppose the reason for you being late for the next lesson will be that the MRT had a punctured tyre?" The whole class laughed so hard, only then i realised i said something stupid. I braved through the drowsiness and managed to finish the class, i rushed home immediately and slept, but so many jokers called and texted me. I really meant it when i said "somebody call me", but nobody called when i was active and awake, jokers call only when i'm about to sleep. Serious, the number of calls and messages today could actually make up the calls and messages i receive in 3 days? My friends are all jokers.

I'm feeling awful now, after eating a mac spciy meal. Fast food is killing me, i've been eating them far too often. I need slow food, perhaps home cooked food. But i'm seldom home, oh well, a "busy" guy has to do his stuff. Just as i'm typing this, my body suddenly becomes to ache. I need a good rest, probably a good dream too.

The rally was awesome ! What i thought awesome wasn't the band, but jo's testimony. So i'm a part of everyone's life, and everyone needs each another to fill their lives. No matter how much i hate you or love you, each and everyone of the people i know fills up the little dot in my painting, my life. Rally ended around 11pm, i hopped on the church's shutter bus for a return trip to st anne's. But i got chased out from 2 of the 3 buses, reason being : i didn't take the bus to the rally. But somehow i managed to hop on the 3rd bus. After all the singing and praying, we were hungry, a big big group of idiots went to Kopitiam at punggol park to eat. I swear we looked like drunkards, laughing all loudly and shouting. So being idiots, we had to go so far to eat that we had to walk home from there. All the food i ate was consumed by the energy needed to walk home. Ended up a hungry tummy again, so idiotic. We're dumb morons, can't blame us for missing out that factor, we all split our different ways and went home. I can't be a robber, ryan and i tried pretending to be robbers outside lynn's house at 1am, trying to scare the shit out of her. But she had no expression when we went "robbery !" I guess i just can't make it. I'm so worned out that i can't remember my sirname now, i need to make full use of whatever little sleep i have right now.

This is the third time i got tricked into attending a meeting i'm not required to ! Phyliss and liz you both make lousy messengers, passed me wrong information 3 times ! Well, but i don't blame you both, i had fun with the people there and you all. So we finished the meeting today and headed for Kopitiam at punngol park. Supposingly to meet only lynn ( which i felt really upest about ) , but we met a whole group of church friends there. So we dined and made fun of ME ( it's always been me.) It was rather late, no buses and so eunice, gen, amerie and i walked home. I did not have the same dream last night, how dissapointing. I'll try again now, BYE !

YES ! I had the best-est dream last night ! I dreamt of meeting "her" in my friend's house ! And in the dream, we clicked damn well and had hell lot of fun. So "she" and my other 2 friends were in the room playing the guitar, singing, chatting and bumming around. Soon, the afternoon came to an end, so we went to chomp chomp for dinner ! After that my damn phone rang the fucking alarm and ruined my dream. Why didn't i set the alarm 10 mins later or so ? So i tried to return to sleep to continue the beautiful dream, but darn, it did not work. So i resigned to my cruel life, got my ass off the bed, brushed my yellowish teeth, combed my hair, dressed up then, OFF to school with a heavy regrettful heart of not trying to set the alarm 10 mins later. I'm so gonna set the alarm 20 mins later for tomorrow, just in case i get the continuation of the dream. I bet my life this is the best thing that could ever happen to a loser guy like me. The dream was like a film running for hours man ! Yay, can't wait for tonight ! Pray it happens again !

Caleb was shitting in his toilet while using his laptop, but lacking dietary fibre, he had constipation. Suddenly he decided to chat with LIZ, upon seeing Liz's display picture, EVERYTHING came out. AH, finally a period of relieve from constipation. Thank you LIZ ! I managed to con berwin 3 bucks to eat a student meal from macdonalds. Thanks ah berwin ! Shall buy you donuts tomorrow. It's been awhile since i hanged out with asiq and the rest. Nobody's calling me nowadays, i think my phone's spolit. CALL ME, ANYBODY just call me.

Last night was the friend's crazy night out. We went for Karaoke in serangoon, first hour or so everyone was shy, " don't want lahh, don't like to sing " was all you could hear. After getting warmed up, we wanted the mics so badly ! Sang wierd songs and the BOMB ! A hindu song ! I swear it was damn cool, the beat was quick, the lyics were fairly easy and such. So just go " kwayra mendai boo " something like that. I left in the evening for some meeting in SVDP, returned only abt 10pm to join them in Chomp chomp, ate some oily oily food and then all home-ed !

Starting my post with a Cheee byeee again. Cheee bye, went to SVDP for a "supposed" meeting. But when amerie, phyllis and me reached there, they said there wasn't a meeting. I stood there blankly eating my strawberry cornetto. Got tricked ! And worst still, everybody's phone is off today ! Out of 3 people i called, two off-ed their phones. I thought i was irritating or something, but aha ! Sadly for you all, NO. It was the English O'levels Oral today, so most of them had to off their phones. So we dined at Jalan kayu, had a great meal and walked to the nearest bus stop. On the way back, we saw a dead cat ! It was stiffened up and as hard as diamond, damn gross. Could have puked out everything i ate for dinner. *Bleahch*

Cheeee byee, found myself in the toilet the moment i woke up. Some bacteria must be in my tummy, having diarohea like the niagra falls. Go to hell bacteria ! Scram and leave me alone so i can leave the toilet alone too, i'm sure the toilet hates me alot for now. DARN, here it goes again.

Today was quite a blast, attended salt then went to SVDP to deliver some stuff. Rained kinda heavily so we ( phyllis, liz & me ) stayed in there for some tea. The rain took forever to stop, so i searched around the area for something to cover ourselves. And i found an umbrella ! So i sheltered the 3 of us to the bus stop, only then i told them i found the umbrella in the dustbin. We headed back to church for thanksgiving dinner, then to the salt room to slack. After that we all home-ed. Great day :)

Big thank you to all whom made my birthday special today, the sms sent, wishes over msn, friendster comments, phone calls and handshakes. I have this group of crazy friends that tricked me into believing only one of them was downstairs waiting for me to pass him some shirts. Ended up, the whole group of them were there with cakes singing me happy birthday near 12am. Must have pissed off some residents :) Not forgetting berwin and gwen whom attended church with me and accompanied me to have nasi lemak for dinner ( take it as a form of celebration too. ) Well, when it's your birthday, friends tend to send greetings to you as early as 7am, waking me up from my sleep. But it's okay, i don't recieve sms at 7am usually :) Perhaps once a year is alright. I end my birthday speech here with a heart filled with gratitude to all my friends. *claps*

I've just got 30 Gig of new life ! Special thanks to myself :) Ah, this makes me feel like any ordinary american teen in california. Caught "Disturbia", the awesome movie today. It totally brought out the flavour of teen life, mischief and romance. Let's not get over the line, it is a thriller, not a love story or something ( which i made it sound quite like one. ) It is not too scary yet quite scary ( senseless huh? ) The lead teen actress was way hot, the actor was kinda hunky too. I would love this show to hit the charts, so i wouldn't wanna elaborate on the film but let you guys go watch it. It's gonna be so worth your money. I seem to be like some movie critic in "Life!" newspaper. Screw it, whatever. Thank you asiq for "treating" me to the movies, the cab fare and whatever else ! PS : You're on a cab fever, crazy fella.

Berwin han is seriously a dork, he was at plaza sing and was supposed to meet his family at little india. But then, being a dork, he came all the way back to sengkang to visit me. Then his phone rang and he look terribly astonished. " Fuck, i'm supposed to meet my mum at little india." So we rushed off. And so it was Uncle Han's birthday ( berwin's dad ), he said his dad was celebrating by bringing them to eat "crap". What the heck !? I asked berwin, "eat crap?" Who on earth celebrates his birthday by treating his family to crap? Only if my family is a pest (which they are), so i might consider treating them to crap soon. After a long and funny conversation on "crap" and "crab", the bus uncle drove berwin away. There goes berwin han, to eat cra*. The * sign is up to you all to decide if it's a "P" or "B". Personally, i prefer "P" !

Feeling a little fucked up, i had a slow walk to punggol park alone last night around 12am, thought it would be spooky, but the 24 hours kopitiam was bustling, endless life going on down there. So i joined in the crowd and ate a plate of chicken rice. Shortly after, i sat down at the badminton court just beside the kopitiam, amazingly the wind was just nice, no flies, many little kids playing around the playground and the national flags swaying from left to right. Ah, what a wonderful sight ! It truly was an enjoyable night, being alone might not be that bad afterall :)

Rush hour 3 and the sushi buffet were good, rush hour 3 was hilarious. Well, we had one and a half hour of free time before the movie started at orchard. So i stupidly walked with a blank mind and stepped on some dog's shit. Like what the hell ? Have you ever seen dog's shit in orchard? Have you? For me, hell no, i've never seen dog's shit in orchard ever since i started going there. And true enough, i didn't see it today too ! And so, i stepped on it. Guess what i did within that one and a half hour of free time? Yes, i spent it washing my shoe in a toilet, totally looked liked an idiot when people stared at me. So moral of the story, do not think that there's no dogshit in town, and if you have free time while waiting for a movie, preferbaly an hour or so, go find dogshit, step on it and enjoy the process of cleaning up. Make sure you clean it all proper, if not the people seating around you in the cinema will think you crapped in your pants and try to look at you after the movie ends to see who is that asshole. " This fella must be damn cheapo, $9.50 ticket wanna make full use, stomache ache also don't wanna go toilet, die die must watch the whole movie, cheapo only. " This will be what they think of you when they start smelling your stench. Alternative, throw away your shoe and start a new trend of "bare-walk".

It's 3.30 am now and i can't sleep. Air supply's song are being repeated over again and again on my computer making me feel all sentimental. When you're so bored, you actually hear the lyrics for a song. So here i am figuring out the lyrics, and i realised it coincides with my life, perhaps everybody's. Members of Air supply must have got into shit i've gotten into before that's why this kinda lyrics pop out, it dosen't just appear from thin air does it? So popstars, famous icons all experienced the same shit as us, knowing this makes me feel better :) I'm not wierd afterall !

It's a usual practice when i go out with berwin and gwen. Yes, i'm sitting at punggol park now waiting while berwin sends her home. Surprisingly there's an internet connection, unsure where it's from but yeah, there is a connection (i'm glad). Being moody doesn't help savage anything, so CALEB WONG ! Get through with it. I haven't been to my granny's house since 23053405 years to avoid my relatives (quarelled with them), and i miss my granny, nephews and neices alot. I happened to browse through the videos in the phone and i saw a video clip of my cute nephew, i suddenly felt a pinch in the heart wanting to cry. I've been so close with him since his birth, 5 years. I realised i can't possibly just leave him and the rest behind, but what can i do? I can't go back to my family anymore because pride prevents me so. Pride kills a man. Pride kills in every aspect of our life. Now berwin han bao su is beside me, he has completed his daily routine of sending gwen lee guan home, now his next mission is to send me home. Bye punggol park, i'll be back like tomorrow again.

It is an extremly crappy day today. Don't ask why, it just is. I'll glady accept it if whatever you said came with a clear mind and nothing else. But if you said it with troubles annoying you or for the "good of others", i'm so sad. I thought everything was going fine, i don't know, i MIGHT be wrong, i don't know. I pray i don't fail my exams and go right straight into the army. If i do, i'll just take it as a way to avoid reality for 2 years, nothing's been going right for awhile, especially since i heard the song "she's out of my leauge". True enough, it applies very "well". I've taken my essay paper today, it went " Give your views on capital punishement (death penalty)." I've been so blank over the past few days that i actually wrote crap. I think i'm so gonna get kicked out of school. "If we meet on the streets someday, and i don't know what to say, look away, i don't want you to see me this way." All guys ! Don't ever hear the song "she's out of my leauge", it's gonna apply for every girl you like, it's somehow a curse.

I feel wierd. So wierd. The picture i painted in my mind is fading gradually by the days. I'm gonna hate that feeling when the picture fades. By the way, sorry berwin, gwen and rozario for leaving you all behind today.

" If you see me walking by, and the tears are in my eyes, look away baby, look away. " Wooohooo, i' think i've a sleeping disorder ! The night is mine to take ! Josh groban called Berwin han, to be his MV lead. His new theme song for the movie so called : "The Jail express"

I "escaped" ( kidding ) from Asiq's chalet, it was supposed to be a three day stay but apparently i stayed for only one day, not really in the mood these few days, appologies. So all my retarded friends are now still in sentosa having fun. I toured the whole of sentosa with some retards at 3am, retards aside, they are great "heart to heart" chat buddies. Usual chalet stuff we always would do, break all their rules ! Swim when the pool is closed (always happens), blasting music, getting caught for climbing a stupid fence ( this was a first. ) I brought totally nothing except my books to the chalet ( i came directly from school ), therefore i was declared a beggar where i had to wear people's boxers, shirts and shorts. It wasn't nice wearing wierd stuff walking around. Goh bai lynn lent me shorts which looked like those of what gorillas wear ( super huge ). I even wore cherine's sports shorts which made me looked like a Effing gay. And the worst thing was i had no slippers, my shoes are high cut shoes, if matched with a shorts, i totally looked like a pixie. So i went around pissing people off by stealing their slippers, simply loveeee disturbing people :)

Declaration of heaven for all the boys in my clique tomorrow. Asiq's birthday chalet where all hell runs loose, nobody to control us ! Okay, we'll all have fun tomorrow, drink, eat and make merry ! I'll keep my promise good to you elmo ! Because it matters :) I'm regretful if i've caused you troubles in any way. Thanks for hearing my rants too ! Although it's like "selling link" ! Today is " Violate me day " Feel free to violate me in any way today, only today. Hurry promotions end 3rd Aug. Violate one time get one time free !